Ah! Dionysius

Our story begins atop a mount.

There sat Dionysus, Lord of the Mount and purveyor of fine musks. The world was grand.

But, alas, an Evil was found and musks were destroyed, and Dionysus complained.

“God,” he said, “come, come, this is rather unfair.”

A reply he did not get, but a plan he did receive.


Ah! Dionysus, Champion of the Innocent and purveyor of fine antique musks...

Thou shall battle Evil.

A Sword of Truth in hand and a Shield of Sooth on back, Dionysus began to wander. In search of Evil. With aspirations of tearing it a new one.

A Day passed.

Then Another.

And a Third.

On the Fourth Day, Dionysus asked of his Sword, “Erm. Where is the Evil that would destroy further the musks of the world?”

An answer was not forthcoming, for he forgot that the Shield, not the Sword, had the gift of oral communication.

The Sword only hacked shit up.

The Fifth Day dawned, and our Hero wondered where he had come to in his Life.

“Yes,” he mused, “a Life dedicated to the sanctity and preservation of musks old and new is indeed a worthy one...”

He paused. Dramatically.

You can find the complete version of Ah! Dionysius in issue 49 of TBD.

Andrew ‘Doc’ Docherty